My thoughts are the same as Rei's.Hey, Hamster, you were the one who initiated this thread but so far you haven't expressed any of your thoughts, yet.
What's your perspective?.
Family's Approval
- Thread starter Hamster
- Start date
thahappycamper
Level 3
....You don't want to be seeking the approval of others for the rest of your life though so eventually you have to man up and do what the fuck you want to do. Besides, people that pass judgement aren't always right. Hamster, if you like this girl, DATE HER. You can always break up later. Better to love and lost than to never have loved, eh?
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I dont really care if they will accept me or not. It really not about them. It about the girl/boy friend
I agreed with you Marvelous, it's always best that everyone are happy within the circle of your life.
Marvelous
Commoner
Some people may think that as long as they have each other, nothing else matter. It is true at the early stage of the relationship, but 2 years went by, things will start to getting old as you start to see the same thing, same face everyday.
lovepink
Commoner
I would definitely care. My family is really traditional. If my partner is disrespectful and rude to my family I wouldn't like it. My uncle is planning to marry an English woman and she doesn't show us any respect. When we are around her she just ignores us. She doesn't interact with the family. Family Birthday gatherings she shows up to the event but never congratulate the person. When she sees us she won't greet us, we always have to greet her first. Even though most of my family strongly dislike her my mother says it doesn't matter because my uncle is the one who loves her that is all that matters, which is true I guess.
lovepink
Commoner
How important is it that your family accept your boyfriend/girlfriend?
65 % out of 100%
Would it bother you if they didn't like the person you're seeing?
Yes it will
Would you care if they didn't approve?
I care.
I am pretty much tame in being with someone. If the person is a bad person, I will leave him before any disapproval is mention. Bad as in, disrespectful to my people, steal, rude, selfish,, etc. etc. No person is worth the headache. I left enough bad guys before. My parent having to disapprove my boyfriend, I do the job first myself.
I say go with what makes you happy. But if she/he is a bad person, leave. Do yourself the favor, it might make you happy to be with that person but it's not happiness. If she/he is not bad, I say be with her/him. That's where my 35% of don't care comes from.
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Yeah I agree with you. But for some people if they love the person nothing else matters to them. They are blinded by love or something. If you make any comments to your family about their choice in bf/gf this might cause conflicts and tensions between family members.
I dated guys that my family member don't like. I tried to make it work with both side first. I expected him to treat my family with respect and for him to change his bad behavior if that was the problem. There is one guy that didn't get along with my family, they hated his attitudes and personality. I break up with him. It was a four years relationship but his personality stayed bad. I didn't want to put up with it for the rest of my life. I sees it myself and no guys is worth the rest of my life.
I started seeing guys as clothes, if it don't fit me, I have to find another one. I no longer wants to put up with issues. In the long run, you won't be living a happy life with him. It's mostly fighting instead of being together. He goes off with his buddy or always coming home late. I sees this in drama, but it's also reality. Many unhappy marriage couple who just settle with one another.
I met him when I was young and I have no experience with dating or choosing the right guy. I'm just a kid. But after four years, it was long enough to get a hint. My current boyfriend, my family likes him more then me. They think he's too nice for me. But what's important, both side are happy. I'm happy with him and so are they, so he must not be a bad choice to stick with.
Most family member wants what best for you. If they are tensing a problem with the guy, I always listen.
My sister is my closet family member to me, if he doesn't like him, I won't stay with him, or he has to change what's making people hates him.
lovepink
Commoner
That's good to hear. I'm sure you feel the same way when your family is happy you are also happy. It is a good relationship and a good choice when all family members have no tension among them regarding their son or daughter's choice in partner.
honeydip0404
Commoner
Love shouldn't have anyone's approval. Your family should love who you want in your life. And eventually come around if they truly care.
Yes, I agreed lovepink. It's so much better that way when your family is happy with the choice you made.